So when was the Suez canal established?
The class erupted.
Otunba with his trademark black cap stands up without being called upon, ‘The canal which constituted a passageway for the malevolent and nefarious designs of the colonialists, reached that stage in an insipid process…’
He is hushed by the lecturer’s lazy wave of the hand. Otunba was just prolix like that. He never missed an opportunity to drop a big word.
Udoka raises his hands in a dignified manner. The class shushes in eager expectation of the answer.
He stands, dusts his suit and starts to speak through his nose. ‘When I hear the Suez Canal, what comes to my mind is a reign of steady encroachment, of pink faced men in their caravans loaded with ivory, of…?’
Finally, Cyprian answers the question.
I sit at the back all through this, calmly thumbing my blackberry phone. The Suez Canal was created in 1869. I know that. Answering questions is for show-offs. I am not that.
Well, that was question time in the political science class of 2010. An avenue for people to show off newly learned words and nasal accents. That did not sit down well with me. Sometimes the eager students were rewarded with a ‘What’s your name by the lecturer?’, and you could see their chest puff out in pride. I felt it is better to stay low-key and ace the tests, than holler and fail-a hollering failure that would be.
Well, school over and I am in the throes of application to foreign institutions. One thing they always request for is references from lecturers-three reference letters! I can imagine going to my lecturers to ask for such:
He adjusts his nose over the bridge of his nose. ‘Ehen Tafa, I don’t know you o! You were not active in my class…What did you score in my exam? ...Good, but I never saw you…Ah! That’s surprising’.
I really wish I was not ‘low-key’ back then, it would make the process of getting this reference letters way easier. So you are in a class now-holler the answer off when that question is asked. Recognition always pays.
Friday, 1 April 2011
Thursday, 31 March 2011
Apply To Join Chimamanda Adichie & Binyavanga Wainaina In The Farafina Trust Creative Writing Workshop 2011
Chimamanda Adichie
The fifth edition of the annual creative writing workshop organized by Farafina Trust will hold from June 23 to July 2, 2011 in Lagos, Nigeria. Award-winning writer and Farafina author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie will be teaching alongside Kenyan writer & Caine Prize Winner, Binyavanga Wainaina. The workshop, sponsored by Nigerian Breweries Plc, will afford participants a golden opportunity to learn a lot via a wide range of reading exercises, as well as daily writing exercises. The workshop aims at improving the craft of Nigerian writers and encouraging published and unpublished writers by bringing different perspectives to the art of storytelling. Participation is limited only to those who apply and are accepted.
To apply, send an e-mail to Udonandu2011@gmail.com. Your e-mail subject should read ‘Workshop Application.’ The body of the e-mail should contain the following:
1. Your Name
2. Your address
3. A few sentences about yourself
4. A writing sample of between 200 and 800 words. The sample must be either fiction or non-fiction.
All material must be pasted or written in the body of the e-mail. Please Do NOT include any attachments in your e-mail. Applications with attachments will be automatically disqualified. Deadline for submissions is April 27 2011. Successful applicants will be notified by June 15 2011. Accommodation in Lagos will be provided for all accepted applicants who are able to attend for the ten-day duration of the workshop. A literary evening of readings, open to the public, will be held at the end of the workshop on July 2, 2011.
The fifth edition of the annual creative writing workshop organized by Farafina Trust will hold from June 23 to July 2, 2011 in Lagos, Nigeria. Award-winning writer and Farafina author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie will be teaching alongside Kenyan writer & Caine Prize Winner, Binyavanga Wainaina. The workshop, sponsored by Nigerian Breweries Plc, will afford participants a golden opportunity to learn a lot via a wide range of reading exercises, as well as daily writing exercises. The workshop aims at improving the craft of Nigerian writers and encouraging published and unpublished writers by bringing different perspectives to the art of storytelling. Participation is limited only to those who apply and are accepted.
To apply, send an e-mail to Udonandu2011@gmail.com. Your e-mail subject should read ‘Workshop Application.’ The body of the e-mail should contain the following:
1. Your Name
2. Your address
3. A few sentences about yourself
4. A writing sample of between 200 and 800 words. The sample must be either fiction or non-fiction.
All material must be pasted or written in the body of the e-mail. Please Do NOT include any attachments in your e-mail. Applications with attachments will be automatically disqualified. Deadline for submissions is April 27 2011. Successful applicants will be notified by June 15 2011. Accommodation in Lagos will be provided for all accepted applicants who are able to attend for the ten-day duration of the workshop. A literary evening of readings, open to the public, will be held at the end of the workshop on July 2, 2011.
Wednesday, 30 March 2011
The Youth Presidential Debate
It was past 4 PM. The only sound that filled the cavernous Ladi Kwali Hall of Sheraton Hotel and Towers, Abuja was the reggae music from a live band rendition. Touted as one of the most significant political youth events in recent times, it was the occasion of the Peoples’ Senate Presidential Youth Debate. Expectations were high. As people milled around, a member of the Peoples’ Senate walked in and promised that the meeting will kick off in five minutes time. Twenty minutes later, he came on stage and called on a fellow senator to give the opening prayer. He gave the opening prayer wearing his cap. Then the national anthem was sung.
The Minister of Women Affairs-Mrs Anneih’s speech was a pointer to the drama this debate would pack. She came on stage and spent some painful, awkward minutes hastily re-reading her speech and making corrections. She finally looked up with an apology ‘I did not get it printed out so I’m trying to correct it’. Then she read the ‘speech’ which was full of a lot of talk about sabotage; her enemies who thought she would die on her return trip and references to the Youth Leader of the PDP who is sixty years old with a head full of white hair. She tore the hall apart when she canvassed for the women to vote for Goodluck Jonathan. The politically variegated crowd erupted into loud murmurings and not a few senators shifted uncomfortably as they saw their unpartisan edifice crumble before them. She finally left the stage, but not before reminding the crowd of the fact that she owned an I-Pad; the ticket to be referred to as a digital leader.
The amiable moderator-Mr Onifade came on stage and the debaters were introduced. There was an awkward moment as the PDP representative clambered eagerly onstage and was verbally restrained by the moderator. The seating arrangement was conducted by picking numbers from a bowl where the PDP representative ironically got the last slot, this was not to determine the debate’s happening as he gallantly defended el presidente’s honor.
The debaters were all seasoned gentlemen in their own rights; Sunday Ogidigbo, lead pastor of the Holyhill church, Adeolu Akinyemi who modestly explained that his friends call him a genius, Ohimai Godwin Amaize, the social advocate whiz kid is the youngest campaign manager in the country, Ajufo Ajufo who hails from a royal family and Uche, the contractor for the ICT Centre in Abia State university, he definitely represented the incumbent.
The debate started in an easy format, the moderator called out a line of policy and each debater within an allotted time pontificated on how his candidate would deal with that area of public policy. This period allowed for them to posit at length on the new slants their candidates would bring and did not allow for sparring. Ohimai was the first to draw blood though as on the area of corruption, he replied with a poker face ‘My candidate will not spend 18 billion naira on a presidential jet or five hundred thousand dollars to refurbish his kitchen’, the PDP candidate flinched visibly and this opened the gateway for this repartee reproduced verbatim:
Deolu: Nigeria’s problems cannot be swept away with a broom
Ohimai: We need candidates who have managed a million naira of their personal money before getting into power
Uche: We have seasoned economists like Sanusi to manage the economy so when people say candidates have not managed a million naira of their personal money; I sincerely don’t know who they are talking about
Soon, it was question time and the debaters unsheathed their claws, as with questions deceptively laced with my brother, my big brother, my pastor…, they mercilessly attacked each other’s candidates. The PDP got the short end of this deal as Uche was questioned on the power probe, excess oil account… Ribadu was questioned on his support of Saminu Turaki of Jigawa who he convicted while in power for a six billion naira scam and allegations on his ‘selective prosecution’. The representatives gallantly parried these attacks; Uche with calm confidence and sometime inane answers like requests for ‘the newspaper where you saw the story’, and Sunday with analogies like ‘Ribadu can’t solve all petitions he received, it’s like pouring a whole bowl of rice into your mouth’.Ohimai also explained to applause how Dele Momodu intended to provide 50, 000 jobs on first day of assuming office, by giving a million naira loan to youth for farming and fertilizer production. Deolu in a blame-shifting tactic, explained Buhari’s detention of Shagari and Ekwueme with the revelation that Ribadu found the duo guilty. Deolu shook his head wistfully when Uche challenged the debaters for their candidate’s wives’ inactivity on the campaign trail. Ajufo’s lackluster performance was covered with an ever ready smile.
The crowd was allowed to throw questions and a few minutes after 9p.m, the debate proper was ended. The ballot papers were collected, furiously counted on site but mysteriously the results were not announced.
The debaters milled around snapping photos, giving backslaps and exchanging bb pins, it was an amiable event and one wondered why the candidates themselves could not adopt this brave and non-zero sum approach to politics.
At the end of the program, the youths were enthroned, for organization, their stellar display and their belief.
.
The Minister of Women Affairs-Mrs Anneih’s speech was a pointer to the drama this debate would pack. She came on stage and spent some painful, awkward minutes hastily re-reading her speech and making corrections. She finally looked up with an apology ‘I did not get it printed out so I’m trying to correct it’. Then she read the ‘speech’ which was full of a lot of talk about sabotage; her enemies who thought she would die on her return trip and references to the Youth Leader of the PDP who is sixty years old with a head full of white hair. She tore the hall apart when she canvassed for the women to vote for Goodluck Jonathan. The politically variegated crowd erupted into loud murmurings and not a few senators shifted uncomfortably as they saw their unpartisan edifice crumble before them. She finally left the stage, but not before reminding the crowd of the fact that she owned an I-Pad; the ticket to be referred to as a digital leader.
The amiable moderator-Mr Onifade came on stage and the debaters were introduced. There was an awkward moment as the PDP representative clambered eagerly onstage and was verbally restrained by the moderator. The seating arrangement was conducted by picking numbers from a bowl where the PDP representative ironically got the last slot, this was not to determine the debate’s happening as he gallantly defended el presidente’s honor.
The debaters were all seasoned gentlemen in their own rights; Sunday Ogidigbo, lead pastor of the Holyhill church, Adeolu Akinyemi who modestly explained that his friends call him a genius, Ohimai Godwin Amaize, the social advocate whiz kid is the youngest campaign manager in the country, Ajufo Ajufo who hails from a royal family and Uche, the contractor for the ICT Centre in Abia State university, he definitely represented the incumbent.
The debate started in an easy format, the moderator called out a line of policy and each debater within an allotted time pontificated on how his candidate would deal with that area of public policy. This period allowed for them to posit at length on the new slants their candidates would bring and did not allow for sparring. Ohimai was the first to draw blood though as on the area of corruption, he replied with a poker face ‘My candidate will not spend 18 billion naira on a presidential jet or five hundred thousand dollars to refurbish his kitchen’, the PDP candidate flinched visibly and this opened the gateway for this repartee reproduced verbatim:
Deolu: Nigeria’s problems cannot be swept away with a broom
Ohimai: We need candidates who have managed a million naira of their personal money before getting into power
Uche: We have seasoned economists like Sanusi to manage the economy so when people say candidates have not managed a million naira of their personal money; I sincerely don’t know who they are talking about
Soon, it was question time and the debaters unsheathed their claws, as with questions deceptively laced with my brother, my big brother, my pastor…, they mercilessly attacked each other’s candidates. The PDP got the short end of this deal as Uche was questioned on the power probe, excess oil account… Ribadu was questioned on his support of Saminu Turaki of Jigawa who he convicted while in power for a six billion naira scam and allegations on his ‘selective prosecution’. The representatives gallantly parried these attacks; Uche with calm confidence and sometime inane answers like requests for ‘the newspaper where you saw the story’, and Sunday with analogies like ‘Ribadu can’t solve all petitions he received, it’s like pouring a whole bowl of rice into your mouth’.Ohimai also explained to applause how Dele Momodu intended to provide 50, 000 jobs on first day of assuming office, by giving a million naira loan to youth for farming and fertilizer production. Deolu in a blame-shifting tactic, explained Buhari’s detention of Shagari and Ekwueme with the revelation that Ribadu found the duo guilty. Deolu shook his head wistfully when Uche challenged the debaters for their candidate’s wives’ inactivity on the campaign trail. Ajufo’s lackluster performance was covered with an ever ready smile.
The crowd was allowed to throw questions and a few minutes after 9p.m, the debate proper was ended. The ballot papers were collected, furiously counted on site but mysteriously the results were not announced.
The debaters milled around snapping photos, giving backslaps and exchanging bb pins, it was an amiable event and one wondered why the candidates themselves could not adopt this brave and non-zero sum approach to politics.
At the end of the program, the youths were enthroned, for organization, their stellar display and their belief.
.
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