Graduate's Musing

Graduate’s Musing

My literature teacher in secondary school said a story must always have a climax and an anti-climax

Little did I know that this applied to life also

Well, my final days in school definitely corresponded to a climax

What with all the tours of bars and binges

We all had high hopes;

Finish school and get paid big bucks in the multinationals

I was the most realistic of my friends

I hoped for a five figure paying job

Well, first morning after school and

All I feel is uncertainty

Gone are the timetables, so I don’t even feel guilt at stabbing a class

Then I hook up with friends; eager faces full of élan over bottles of beer

Ade wants to further, Arab wants a professional course, Chu wants to work and Josh is in his father’s company

Now I know that post graduation is like the game of golf; individualistic

We can’t all go the same route

So I log on to view the much hyped scholarship opportunities

And I get offers from Mexico and Botswana,

Bombers may bomb and legislators may tomfool, but my Naija is better than these

And the Commonwealth says you must be discharged from NYSC to apply

You notice there are no opportunities to intern around

Almost all job offers are pro bono, just like this piece for Businessday

No places to even engage in volunteer work which is a prerequisite for scholarships

So most engage in hedonism; booze and sex being the favourite

While others feel their IQ’s plummet as they log in hours on a game console

You blame the University for removing that gift of routine from your life

You rue your graduation and envy classmates whose fathers have companies

And the church is always the best refuge

As you get a position straightaway: ‘brother’ and a task; ‘follow up the newcomers’

So you attend vigils and cast and bind legislators which should be stoned

When you return from a vigil at 3a.m, you feel purposeful

But hair suffocated and your muttering of incoherent tongues make you feel like the witch yourself

Depleting bank account

Stares from family members who wait for the graduate to ‘perform’

And you wait futilely for the call up in which you would be flung as far as possible

At the back of your mind nags the thought that classmates have fared better

Well the ladies always give birth and marry

You wonder if the degree sitting pretty was worth it

While other times you cherish memories and feel intellectually superior for experiences garnered

A computer village apprentice might be better off

As your president bemoans the quality of graduates

These are the conflicting thoughts of a graduate I must say

So you step up to the street corner

And enrol in a french school; ‎‎good- for the CV

Start up at the tailoring institute; learning a trade always helps

Help out at the bakery; confectionery pays these days

Spend less time on facebook & twitter; life is better improved than talked about

The google bar permanently on; there should be a scholarship lurking somewhere

So you don't stay in one spot  & claim 'Nigeria happened'

Aye..a graduate's  better must always be best...